Motivation and Drive within Myself.

It's about time I write a new entry in my blog...
In case you're wondering where I've been, what I'm doing and when I'll be back...

This is the first year of my life that has been so different that it's been hard for me to handle... mentally. I started college in the fall of 2013 at Maryville University to study pre-optometry. Living an hour away from the school, it wasn't reasonable to have to drive to school 5 days a week from home for classes... So I moved in with my aunt and uncle, only 10 minutes from campus.

Life as I knew it suddenly changed. I went from being home every day to only being able to come home on the weekends. Studying and going to school 5 days a week, driving home Friday, working Friday, relaxing on Saturday and returning to Chesterfield every Sunday.

I have struggled for a very long time to keep my head up and keep moving forward. I can not bring any of my pets to live with me in the city, even my Mar (the cat).

Not only did this mean that I can only train my dogs agility two days a week at a maximum (depending on weather), but I could only see them roughly two days a week. I know my parents take great care of them and give them their supplements daily, but when you have to leave what you love so much every week, it's heartbreaking...

Ace is semi-retired from agility now for personal reasons, so I mostly just work with Strike in agility. Strike is 17 months old as of right now and has not competed, in result I have been getting questioned about why I haven't put him in the ring yet as I could be working on my titles. This irritates me, because the people who ask me this don't know my situation.

I've been on my own to train Strike. I can't afford online classes or seminars, and I am not even with my dogs during the week for the possibility of taking classes with anyone. My opportunity in regards to classes is zero, and that is just the way things will have to be.

Along with my training time cut short every week due to the lack of time I have with them, I have to do things different. Strike has a lovely running dogwalk and aframe. I worked very hard on this, but I am wanting to put a 2o2o on him as well, and as a result, I have received criticism for this. So let me just explain right here for those of you who are so against this idea. I do not want to attempt and expect a running contact hit when we begin to trial with the lack of weekly time I have to work on things. I want to have a solid 2o2o as a separate command (dual contacts) so that I can use that in trial until I have the opportunity to have him run other dogwalks besides the one I have at home. Until summer time, when I can work on things daily will things change and become more solid.

Let me be clear - I do not do agility for the title. I do not do agility for the aspect of competing against others. I don't do agility to "win". I do agility because it is a stress reliever and a way for me to have fun with my dogs. Agility gave me confidence, and although I still have a lot of confidence to build, I am so proud of present-day self. I went from a shy, quiet individual who thought communicating with anyone I didn't know would kill me to a confident young individual who can approach others with ease and engage in small talk - something I previously could have never done... and this was all thanks to agility.

I do not see myself in competition with anyone but myself.

I am not out to win. I am not out to necessarily have the fastest dog possible for the highest odds of winning. None of that matters to me. I have a BLAST running Ace, my slower and now semi-handicap dog. I wouldn't change the way he runs or anything about him for the fastest agility dog in the world.

 It isn't about the Q. It isn't about the YPS. It isn't about the placement.

It's about the fun and the privilege I have to run side by side with my best friend.

Yeah, it sucks that I will not be able to trial much anymore and that I can and will only be able to enter on Saturdays because of school and commuting back and forth to the city during the school year, but I still have motivation and drive somewhere within myself. Not do to good in agility necessarily, but to live life to the fullest and not give a damn about what others think of me. 

I am working very hard through my 7-8 years of schooling to provide myself with the best career for me. I love my dogs, but I also want to be very successful in life and that is why I am so driven to continue on this path - this long journey. To make something of myself. To have a career where I will be able to afford trialing, building my own facility, moving wherever I want to live, being financially stable and most importantly - being the happiest person I could ever be.

I wouldn't be able to have all of this drive and motivation without my friends and family there to support me and keeping my head up when the going gets rough. Thank you everyone who has positively impacted my life and helps me up when I fall down.